By popular demand, here are some photos from Bowie’s birthday festivities!

On her actual birthday, we set our gifts in the living room for her to find in the morning under a big parachute (like you may have used in gym class as a kid?). Watching her come out and find them was pretty adorable. We had also started setting up for her party, and she was so psyched to see her year in frames (see the party spread photo) that she just stopped crawling, sat up, and stared for a while. Admittedly, we did pretty much the same thing immediately after Cody hung the pictures up. After her morning nap, Lola arrived and we headed on an adventure to the aquarium, followed by lunch at the Old Spaghetti Factory since homegirl loves spaghetti these days and noodles on birthdays are a tradition in my family.

Bowie was so worn out from her outing that her afternoon nap lasted almost until her bedtime (and who has the heart to wake up a tuckered, growing birthday girl? Not me!). She did get up for a little while, though, just so Mom, Dad, and Lola could sing “Happy Birthday” to our little one around a tiny cake I made for her. The birthday song made her cry before, so we figured a practice run would be helpful before her party. While she did experiment with the cake a bit, she ultimately chose peas and pears instead, leaving me with a pretty nice midnight snack!

Since Bowie’s birthday fell on a weekday, we had her party a couple of days later at our house. Our place is pretty modestly sized, but thank goodness for summer birthdays, because our yard becomes like an extra living room. Cody worked super hard with some assistance from Grandpa Ken and some family friends to turn part of our multi-level, paved and rocky yard into a fun and safe play area for the kids. The morning of the party was somewhat stressful as I had made the mistake of going to bed way later in an effort to get a head start on preparations, AND of course since she knew something was going on, she had no interest in napping. Oh boy. But, once again, Cody is a hero and pulled together what I couldn’t (and woke me up when I accidentally fell asleep while trying to get Bowie to sleep)! Without going too bonkers thematically, we went with a rainbow approach (get it? Rainbowie!). I highly recommend it because apart from making things look bright and cheery, when you have leftover supplies, you’re basically set to throw your next five parties. As with most first birthday party parent posts: I wish we had taken more pictures. Anyhow, I think Bowie felt super loved and celebrated, and that’s what matters!

First, some feels: A year ago, despite everything we were told, Cody and I could not have possibly imagined how this time would pass so quickly or how amazing it would be to meet our baby and watch her grow, learn, and become all the things she’s becoming. Bowie astounds us daily with her ambition, perseverance, resilience, humor, and sweetness. We truly feel like the luckiest parents. Recently an article came out regarding some German researchers’ findings that happiness plummets in early parenthood… For us, perhaps our backs hurt in a way that assures us we’re growing older, but aside from that, I don’t know if Cody or I have ever been happier. We couldn’t be more grateful that the universe entrusted us with such a bright and beautiful tiny human to burst our hearts open and fill them with so much good stuff. Thanks for being our baby, Bowie!

Now for your regularly scheduled updates:

• Bowie closes out her first year with a fast-growing vocabulary that has officially outpaced our attempts with signing. She’s added “more,” “done,” “shoe,” “hat,” “baby,” and perhaps most importantly, “cookie,” to her arsenal. She understands a lot more than she can speak, and it’s so cool to hear her experiment and work on shaping her sounds so that we can understand her.
• This month on one of our low tide walks, Bowie wanted out of the sling and onto the sand. We happily obliged, and watching her boldly flail across the beach and into the tiny waves with a fist full of seaweed and a mouth full of laughter was pretty magical. Ever since, I’ve kept a tide prediction calendar open on my phone and a bottle of baby powder in the car for what’s become her favorite activity for getting wiggles out. (Sidenote: How badly do I wish I knew the baby powder trick when I was a kid?!)
• Some of Bowie’s other favorite things to do lately: pulling records off of the shelf, snuggling (her parents, her dog brothers, her stuffed animals, her books, sometimes even the floor), pretending to talk on the phone, climbing onto the couch, and going on “pony rides” (we bounce her on our back while humming the theme from Bonanza)
• Her favorite foods right now seem to be broccoli, mozzarella cheese, pasta, graham crackers, and a fairly constant rotation of fruits. However, as I’ve recently become somewhat obsessed with French macarons, she’s also been pretty psyched to try a bite of a new flavor every time we stop by the bakery.

Thanks for following Bowie’s first year with us. It’s been my favorite time so far. (And sorry for the smaller gallery this month… We’ve been having some technical difficulties, and if I can figure out where the rest of our pictures are, I’ll add them here. Has anyone else had and resolved photo issues with the latest Apple update? Your advice is welcome!)

You guys. The next time I make one of these updates, I will be the mother of a ONE YEAR OLD. That thought is almost more unbelievable to me than the fact that I have a baby. This month’s developments:

• Bowie is a flying ace! Our girl’s first plane rides went so well. We were told 10/11-month-olds are challenging to fly with, so I was nervous, but she slept, she ate, she played, she made friends with the people sitting behind us. Seriously, not so bad!
• And of course, the point of the flying: Bowie had a wonderful time with family in South Dakota! She fell into the swing of things in no time and clearly enjoyed entertaining her Grandma, Great Grandma, Grandpa, and Uncle Phil and visiting with Aunt Linda and Suzie. She was all scrunchy smiles every morning as she realized we were still at grandma’s house, surrounded by people who love her and all kinds of neat stuff to explore.
• While at Grandma’s house, Bowie grew in more leaps and bounds, figuring out how to stand up unassisted in the center of a floor, and learning to say “night night” for bedtime goodbyes and “bzzz” when asked what bees say.
• Bowie, who now often says “git!” when she sees a guitar, stayed out for her first post-bedtime concert this month. She gets so excited when we listen to the Thermals in the car, we couldn’t pass up the opportunity to let her see them live when they played at West Seattle Summer Fest. She bounced up and down in our carrier for the first half of the set before falling asleep!
• This summer has been gorgeous, so we’ve been spending a good amount of time outside when it’s not too hot. Bowie loves to watch the birds hunting out food at low tide, picking and eating berries in the garden, and splashing in pools of all sizes. (And when it is too hot, standing directly in front of the AC is her favorite!)

Sorry for the delay posting this month, but… ten months. I actually almost cried a little typing that. How is our lady almost a year old already?!

• We couldn’t have asked for sweeter starts and ends to our days. Bowie is a smiling chatterbox as soon as her eyes open in the morning. All those times greeting her “magandang umaga” (“good morning” in Tagalog) seem to have rubbed off as “magaga gogaga” are typically the first sounds she makes when she wakes up. And at night, getting her sillies out is our favorite part of her bedtime routine. She’ll put her head down and butt up as an invitation to help her tumble, or she’ll giggle over and over at just about any two-syllable phrase before snuggling down for a story and sleep.
• Half of our pictures of her are blurry now because she’s constantly on the move! She has places to crawl, furniture to climb, and she’s started standing long enough on her own to try taking a step or two. The best is seeing how excited and proud she is of every new achievement and discovery – her joy is completely infectious.
• She’s got a pretty charming mischievous streak, and clearly already understands that she’s not supposed to touch some things around the house. She specifically looks at us and smiles with an extra sparkle in her eye just before touching those things, which is possibly our fault for buying such a shiny trash can.
• We had our first “potty pause” this month, which is Elimination Communication terminology for a period when baby protests using the toilet or potty, opting to go in their diaper backup or clothes instead. After a bit of reading and patient observation, we decided to switch to training pants, undies, or Pull-Ups to offer Bowie a new way to be a more active participant in her bathroom process. I may have also started singing a song about being “a super duper pooper.” Both changes have been pretty helpful and exciting for her. I’m just grateful that we seem to be back to normal and that it was only a couple of days of pause. It was so disheartening, but it really did help me to reevaluate how we approach pottying in light of Bowie’s growing skill set!
• A few of Bowie’s current favorite things: The Nose Book, Where Are Maisy’s Friends, I am a Bunny, and Little Owl’s Night are books that make her smile really big when you read them to her. Blueberries, broccoli, raspberries, and mozzarella cheese are foods that disappear quickly when placed in front of her. “Raining Tacos” and “Nom Nom Nom” are songs that always make her laugh, not to mention our re-written Bowie-centric versions of Salt-N-Pepa’s “Push It” and Queen’s “We Will Rock You.”

This month we’re looking forward to Bowie’s first airplane rides to visit family in South Dakota. Wish us luck, and let us know if you have any tips for traveling with a busy and vocal baby!

Bowie has now been out almost as long as she was in! This is absolutely crazy to me. And she’s continued to move and grow in leaps and bounds this month. It’s absolutely bittersweet because of course you want her to be this sweet tiny baby forever, but every day we get excited for all the new adventures we’ll get to have as she becomes more curious and capable.

• Bowie is working so hard on talking! She is close to saying “all done,” along with “Mama” and “Dada.” We also try to incorporate sign language, and I was ecstatic when she signed “potty” for the first time this week when she had to go! It’s really wonderful to see how happy she is when she can effectively ask and be responded to.
• She is also an excellent listener, and it’s awesome to see what she understands. We now can say, “Bowie, why don’t you go pick out a couple of books to read before dinner?” and she will crawl to her books and pull one off the shelf. And then while reading, I’ll sometimes ask her to please turn the page, and she’s proud to do it!
• She has six teeth. After that second one popped last month, the next four all came at the same time! It’s easy to hope her teething days will be limited to a few crazy events like this.
• Bowie’s scoot is now interspersed with actual crawling and what seem to be occasional attempts to simply stand up without the help of something to pull herself up on. Of course, if there is something to pull herself up on, she goes for it. Suitable pulling-up assists may include anything from her activity cube to trustworthy human beings.
• While Bowie continues to love exploring new foods, she would much rather feed herself than be fed. True to her Filipina side, she is only too pleased to be handed an entire mango seed to mow down on or a good chunk of papaya.

Photos!

Bowie has been busy! This month has been pretty big for our little one:

• She’s officially mobile! When she’s on the couch, she’ll use the armrest to pull herself up to stand from sitting, and on the floor she’s gotten the hang of moving from sitting down to scooting. Bowie seems especially motivated by things that aren’t her toys. Yesterday she went for a container of puffs, knocked it open, and celebrated her victory by sharing her hard-earned snacks with Winston.
• Her second tooth has just barely sprouted, and a third one is looking pretty close to popping soon!
• Some of Bowie’s new favorite activities are blanket fort peek-a-boo (she even lifts the blanket herself to play!), shaking her purple maraca to music and rhyming books, and climbing her human jungle gyms (aka Mama and Dad).
• She’s been making a scrunchy silly face a lot this month. We think it started as a response to some not-quite-ripe blueberries, but after seeing how it made us laugh, she’s started doing it whenever a giggle seems in order.
• Also greatly entertaining: She talks in her sleep!
• Bowie continues to be an adventurous eater and wants to taste everything she sees. A table of women sitting across the room from us burst into squeals and laughter as she tried a lime for the first time and kept asking for more. Her favorites at the moment seem to be raspberries, navel oranges, butternut squash, and Cheerios.

Photos!

Bowie, our daughter who was Instagrammed by super cool band the Thermals wearing a button celebrating their second LP, is seven months old! A few updates:

• Bowie laughs a lot. Animal sounds, learning names for people and things, watching Winston fetch the tennis ball, silly faces, other people laughing, sometimes just exploring familiar places from new angles is enough to make her burst into giggles.
• She’s a great adventurous eater, and this month has come around on avocados and also enjoyed apples, mangos, and sweet potatoes.
• Now that she’s got a tooth and is eating, we’ve added toothbrushing to our bedtime routine. She has her own special banana-shaped toothbrush that she flails around in excitement about when she sees that it’s time to brush her tooth.
• She’s taken to tapping random rhythms all over the place. She’ll pat us on the shoulder when we carry her, or the wall while we’re getting her dressed, or she’ll tap her foot against her potty chair while waiting to go (which is especially cute).
• While Chicka Chicka Boom Boom is still her favorite, she also gets excited about her Colors with Sophie La Girafe book, Barnyard Dance by Sandra Boynton, and Goodnight Moon before bed (thanks, Aunt Cathy!).
• Bowie’s favorite songs lately are “She Loves You” by the Beatles (sometimes she even sings the “yeah”s!), “How We Know” and “Pillar of Salt” by the Thermals, “Bahay Kubo” (Filipino folk song), and when Dad plays the blues for her on guitar.

Up until now, Cody and I have used this space almost exclusively to keep more distant family and friends apprised of our daughter Bowie’s first year of life. While we will continue to do that, I also want to begin writing other entries. Personal discoveries, projects, things to share with other new parents… “bloggier” things, I guess. Here’s why…

New motherhood is often described as isolating, and compounded with that is the unique position I find myself in: a “hard reset.” I disconnected from most of what comprised my sense of self shortly before becoming a mom. I became a caregiver for my grandmother four years ago. Family caregiving for an elderly person with dementia can be isolating for anyone, arguably more so for anyone in their 20s as there aren’t as many of us doing it. Witnessing dementia’s attack on my grandmother’s independence and memories rendered the context of my musical endeavors suddenly trivial while staples and landmarks of being a 20-something became both vapid and unattainably foreign. I stopped knowing how to relate to the people around me when I tried to “go out and be normal.” When I stepped away from caregiving in our second trimester, I felt lost. Social anxiety be damned, I tried reconnecting with old friends and making new ones, but my days had been heavy with mortality and decay for so long. Connecting with anyone who didn’t understand I had all but collapsed under that weight seemed like an insurmountable challenge.

Among other things, giving birth gave me an explosive, growing bundle of endorphins. I love Bowie more than I’ve ever loved anything, and being her mom is the highlight of my life so far. Because my table was cleared off for her entry, I feel fortunate to be able to rebuild my life around her. Detached from the usual social norms that can make motherhood seem overwhelming, I have literally no outside obligation to anything or anyone else – no career momentum to maintain and no one to watch enviously as they continue living a life I used to. Though (as I’ve mentioned before) I was never “driven” to become a mom, it’s the first time since my days with Visqueen that I have felt “in place.”

That said, I’m still not sure how to connect with other people anymore. It’s been a while. But for Bowie’s sake, I know I should start trying again. So I’m writing here in the hopes that if I am open, my new people will find me. (Or my old ones, if you’re out there wondering what happened to me.) Writing has always been how I process things, so maybe I’ll be learning myself right along with you. We can grow weird together. Like in middle school. Or something.

Speaking of weird, my other motivation here is to make a place for the moms and moms-to-be who may feel weird to feel reassured. While pregnant, I had no idea what kind of mom I would be. I prepared myself for birth, but I think in regard to actual motherhood, I just assumed that you do what everyone else does… Diapers, cribs, bottles, complain about lacking sleep, etc. However, our birthing experience taught me to hear and obey my instincts. Once Bowie got here, many of those assumptions didn’t feel like the best fit for us. Most Pinterest lists of “must-have baby gear” and “tips for your first weeks with a newborn” swiftly became absurd at best and disempowering at worst (except for the thing about aloe and witch hazel pads, which were awesome). While I don’t think there’s anything wrong with many of the modern niceties made to make parenting more convenient, a lot of them counter my own instincts. I’m reminded regularly that I’m not the mom The Bump and BabyCenter seem to think we all are, but I know I’m not the only one like me. I hope that I can be a supporter of other instinct-driven parents whose inner voice steers them a little bit away from the presumed course.

Half of a year! Happy half-birthday, Bowie! It doesn’t feel like it’s been six months, but here we are, settled into a daily rhythm with a strong and effervescent little girl. She has found new ways to communicate without crying, which feels amazing as a parent to realize it’s been days since your baby cried. (Not today, though. Today her first tooth has pierced its way through her gums, which seems painful enough that I may have cried for her.) Her needs are met, she is growing fast, she laughs hard every day (even today), and smiles at people. She’s a full-fledged little person. Some highlights:

• Food! We figured we’d take our time introducing solids, but Bowie was eager and curious! Finally, after a night of trying to keep her hands off of our plates of Indian takeout, we decided we’d give it a shot. So far, she’s tried avocados, bananas, peas, carrots, and oranges. She remains skeptical of the avocados, but she seems to love everything else (even if it feels weird in her mouth)!
• Rolling onto her tummy is no longer a weird, rare occurrence but a thing she just does all the time when you put her down… and sometimes in her sleep… which causes her to wake up both confused and frustrated until you remind her how to turn back over.
• Our baby is a jumping bean and dancin’ machine! If Bowie is excited, she jumps up and down. If you play a song she likes, she jumps up and down. If she’s meeting a new friend, she jumps up and down. Basically, if she is standing, she might as well be jumping.
• Grandpa Bill and Grandma Judy came for a visit. Bowie had fun reading stories and snuggling with them, plus she got to go on her first carousel ride!

Anyway, now we’ve got six months left for party-planning!